Visitor Comments:

(Submitted by mefirst)

mefirst

(Submitted by MarkB)

Paper towels! Paper towels! and photographs ... nudge nudge wink wink

(Submitted by The Waltons)

Wal*Mart should reward you with something. Maybe a commercial spot.

(Submitted by flatsoda.com)

Hey I went to Wal*Mart today, but I lost the receipt. :(

(Submitted by spooked)

Hey Derek! I went to Walmart today and picked up 7 rolls of film I had developed and an 8 pack of paper towels! Maybe I was right behind you in line. I'm crushed that you didn't say hello, after all the hours I've devoted to your website. Of course, it looks like you were busy thinking about the big party you were planning, hair access, batteries, liquid soap and mtdew. Boy, I wish I could get invited to a party like that. You'll definitely need the apap caplets tomorrow morning.

(Submitted by melon)

16 items, thats the biggest number i heard in my life.

(Submitted by JicaLea)

Do you have any pics? I'd really like to see your hair, as much money as you spend on it.

(Submitted by ashe)

Hmmmm.....batteries.....hair accessories....paper towels...clean gel....and liquid soap. Apap caplets? Sounds like our boy derek is planning some kind of freaky-ass rave party.

(Submitted by Chiquita)

Derek, were you eating something greasy (maybe fries or popcorn from the Wal*Mart eatery) while holding this receipt? It's got little grease marks all over it.

(Submitted by susie)

WINGAPOW...

(Submitted by MarkB)

I don't know about Derek's area but some Wal-Marts have mini-McDonald's in them ... that's a potential grease source is there ever was one

(Submitted by gobi)

Keep an eye on that Operator #1705, she has a history of ringing up items twice. In April of this year she won the 'OVER RINGING AWARD' two weeks in a row. Next time you see her look for the pin with the oak leaf cluster on her fancy blue smock.

(Submitted by Chiquita)

I know, Derek. You were eating deep fried Moutain Oysters. Yum, yum. They are sooooo good. I bite into them and the grease runs off the end of my chin. (Chinny-chin-chin.) But, they cause a lot of gas! So my lover Dalliance can't eat them. She farts too much anyway...

(Submitted by The real Chiquita)

Ok, I'm tired of people impersonating me. No more posts by me, if you see any posts by so-called Chiquitas, don't be fooled. Bye all.

(Submitted by Carmen)

You'd think with all the soap and paper towels, he could've cleaned all that grease off.

(Submitted by Karma Comes Around)

"Meanness is a sign of impotency"

(Submitted by limp noodle)

so THAT's my problem ... I hope Wal-Mart starts to carry generic "Sam's Choice" viagra

(Submitted by reality check)

"Imitation is jealousy schooled by cowardice."

(Submitted by Realty Chuck)

" ... and the sincerest form of flattery" and a many- splendored thing and ...

(Submitted by Special ProMo)

Voided Entries: Free at Wal*Mart. Get 'em now cause they are going fast!!

(Submitted by Joe Mamma)

I got one and I LOVED it so much that I've been cruising the sidewalk outside of Wal*Mart ever since!!!!

(Submitted by Bonnie Piesse's lame chicken)

Sorry, Melon, but he has bought 21 items before (19 June 98). I for one (though I'm sure Derek's girlie is even more so) relieved that he has finally bought some paper towels to stuff up his girlie's whatsie. She's been bleeding unchecked for what seems like weeks now, no maxis in sight, not even a filter pad or some sponge tape. Thank god for WM P TWL 3PK!

(Submitted by The person what had to go and check for his own peace of mind)

Oh gobi wise one, you lie.

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell)

I should think, Ms Lame Chicken, that WM brand towels would be somewhat scratchy for one's soft juicy bits. I would prefer a Tim Tam up the love tunnel than a bit of unbleached recycled cardboard.

(Submitted by Jelly Roll Morton)

Goddamn, my gel is SO unclean, maybe I could borrow some liquid soap from Derek to clean it. His gel is always remarkably clean.

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell)

Just thought: is a melted Tim Tam up the pussy a voided entry?

(Submitted by simply disgusted)

Im simply grossed out by your nasty remark Mrs. Campbell. You need Jesus! John 3:16. God Bless!!

(Submitted by John 3:16)

If you need Jesus, I bet Wal- Mart sells little plastic ones

(Submitted by MarkB)

Mrs. Campbell, I had to do exhaustive research (i.e. 30 seconds on the Internet) to find out that a Tim Tam is some kind of Aussie cookie ... and then I had to watch some ad with a genie in a lamp or something

(Submitted by Christina Aguilera)

Hi! That was me! *giggle* *preen* *prance*

(Submitted by Barbara Eden)

That was me, you painted little hussy. I was shakin' it like there was no tomorrow while you were still a gleam in your fathers eye. Oh Master!!!*squeal*

(Submitted by Dalliance (but you can call me, Che(ina)))

*smug grin* well, i see Derek got our "Unroll the Pharoah" photos processed. Eat your hearts out, boys and girls!

(Submitted by Che in Pink Bikini)

Mrs. Campbell..not until it's tam is licky-timmed out is it considered a "voided entry". woo hoo..here, have a 'Little Debbie' Swiss Roll.

(Submitted by mcmycee)

God Bless America!! The land of opportunity. We love it, and I wish we could just stroll into a WalMart, K Mart, Publix, Goodings etc whenever we wanted. Don't take these things for granted. You can't get them everywhere!!!(Not in the Shitty UK anyway!!!)

(Submitted by princess)

Wal*MArt rocks! I love to sew and make my own threads, and they have the best material, for the cheapest price. So Derek, do you have a McDonald's in your Wal*Mart?

(Submitted by Mr. French)

My word! "Shitty UK"? I am aghast! After all, it was here in the colonies that my poor sweet Buffy decided that life was just too miserable to go on. Died with a needle in her arm, poor dear. Not to say how the suicide affected poor Cissy and Jodie. Perhaps if we had Wal*Marts in the states back then, this tragedy could have been avoided. (I can see Buffy now, prancing between the toy and lighting fixure aisles with her sweet Mrs. Beasley, a contented child for sure) Well, nevermind, her wonderful Uncle Bill decided to ship us all off to the UK where we have squelched our greif with daily exursions to Harrods. Oh, Wal*Mart, where were you when we needed you??? RIP Buffy

(Submitted by Darien)

I'm new to this sight...I don't have a Wal-Mart near me. I think I need to petition for one. How much do you think you've spent there?

(Submitted by i am not in marketing i swear)

mrmycee..good news, Walmart is on it's way to the UK..course I have a hard time imagining the "Super Store" version there..that's the kind where you can get your wheels rotated, buy maramite and crumpets, clothes and get new glasses, among other things. Oh, and eat at McDonalds and get your photos developed, but not nearly as quaintly.

(Submitted by Capt. Sulu)

I'm waiting for him to go by some condoms, vaseline, ladies lingerie, videotape, and of course...... Mountain Dew!

(Submitted by Bonnie Piesse's lame chicken)

Dear Captain Sulu, he needs none of these as long as he has filter pads. Filter pads filter pads filter pads! I bleed for filter pads!!

(Submitted by Nicey)

It's always good to have access to your hair. This website is the best website ever. I save receipts too.

(Submitted by "WE" N/A)

MRS.CAMBELL ANY FURTHER REMARKS? YOU PROBABLY THOUGHT YOU WERE FUNNY...I'D FEEL PRETTY ASHAMED OF MYSELF IF I WERE YOU! UNBELIEVABLE HOW A SWEET PERSON SUCH AS YOURSELF COULD HAVE SUCH A FILTHY REMARK.

(Submitted by WalFix)

It twern't the real Mrs. Campbell, friends. She's got far too good taste to talk about her "good taste".

(Submitted by Mrs Campbell)

My god, has someone been impersonating me? Oh my, I'm all overcome, I think I'll have to go make a cuppa and dunk a Tim Tam.

(Submitted by we "N/A")

Mrs. Campbell, Is it really that hard for you to respect some one else's opinion? Try cleaning out your vocabulary!

(Submitted by WE "N/A")

SOMETIMES I GET MAD AND MEAN..SOMETIMES I'M HAPPY.. AND WHEN I WANT TO CRY I DO..WHEN I'M BY MYSELF AT NIGHT... 9I HOLD MY TEDDY TIGHT..UNTIL THE MORNING LIGHT MY NAME IS YOU..

(Submitted by Dalliance)

why, that is lovely WE "N/A", reminds me of a Rumi poem, but, question, why the hostility toward sweet Mrs. Campbell? Can't a lady choose to do what she will with her own sweets and love tunnel? As, if we all haven't enjoyed the delciousness of ourselves at least once or twice.

(Submitted by Dalliance - Verbal Revolutionary)

or was it the word, pussy? Pussy Pussy Pussy Pussy..see there....let us all reappropriate those words for ourselves, ladies, after all they're only words..doesn't change the fact that a rose is a rose and still smells as sweet..cunt..cunt..cunt..twat. .twat..vagina..vagina..see there, only words, does it really matter??? Mine still belongs to me and is just as beautiful, regardless of what it's called.

(Submitted by Justin Case)

I'm gonna give Matt Krieg a call and have you banned from his store. You kinda freak me out.

(Submitted by Dalliance - (Read only if interested in the word - Cunt))

Banned for saying "cunt"? hahhahaha! Go ahead Justin, call him. Just in case anyone is interested..the word 'cunt' is not slang - it's a very ancient word. From the same root stock came the words, kin, country, kind. (Old English 'cyn', Gothic 'kuni', Middle English 'cunte', Old Norse and Frisian 'kunta', Latin 'cunnus', Basque 'cuna')also the words cunning, kenning and ken: knowledge, learning, insight, wisdom. Kin meant not only the matrilineal blood relations but also a cleft or crevice, the Goddess's genital opening. Other cognates include "cunabula" a cradle, or earliest abode. It wasn't until medieval clergy men preceived obscenity in the female-genital shrines of the pagans:holy caves, wells and groves that the word assumed the insulting modern sense (thank you Medieval clergyman once again). Those that worshipped there were hunted down and persecuted as witches and were often called after the place names by the clergy - 'cunnus diaboli', or 'devilish cunt'. Hence the preverted usage of today. The End. Thank you, thank you very much.

(Submitted by WE "N/A")

Dalliance, I believe that i speak for many when i say, you really should seek proffesional help. God gave us our bodies, so that we may respect them, not to flaunt them or treat them as a drive thru-I am only hoping that you are not serious about the words you comment, and maybe you will some day realize that you should be treating your body as a temple-and if you need to feel like you belong, try giving your heart to the Lord, he has many wonderful things to offer...

(Submitted by Dalliance)

Bite me

(Submitted by Dalliance)

and yeah, the Lord gave 'me' my body so let me mind it...you, dear WE, can keep your dogma off it please and try reading some Nietzsche sometime.

(Submitted by Freud )

Screw Mushu and the Compubank he rode in on.

(Submitted by DAVID )

I HAVE AN ADULT TRIKE THAT WAS HARDLY USED (MAYBE THREE TIMES IN THE PAST FIVE YEARS AND IN GREAT CONDITION. I WILL PROVIDE PICS IF NEED BE. THANKS ALL FOR YOUR COOPERATION AS I NEED TO HAVE MORE ROOM IN THE APARTMENT AND MAY BE MOVING IN THE NEAR FUTURE.

(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )

THANK YOU FOR TAKING PICS OF ME MODELING HALF OF MY WARDROBE!

(Submitted by pussy lover )

I like pussy. Especially when it's warm and juicy. It simply melts in my mouth.

(Submitted by pussy lover )

Don't you guys agree?

(Submitted by judy )

dude, your a fucking nut!

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

Dereks pussy would prefer to have some more litter than to be in your mouth, I'm quite sure. Of course, if the cat shit in your mouth, that would be funny too.