Visitor Comments:

(Submitted by jenay )

*dancing* YMCA!!!!

(Submitted by Jenay )

Somehow PETR JELLY doesn't fit in with the Easter theme...

(Submitted by Chiq )

*doing 3rd poster EASTERDECOR dance*

(Submitted by Chiqca again )

Uhh, I'm thinking if your PETR's got JELLY, then you've got a problem... perhaps an antibiotic will help.

(Submitted by Hill Lord )

*reminding Chiq that she's the 2nd poster and *I'm* the 3rd poster*

(Submitted by Hill Lord )

I hope that PETR JELLY is easier to work with than the PETR PNT BTTR was. I still keep finding Jif in the nooks and crannys of my... umm.. well you know.

(Submitted by Huh? )

EASTERDECOR! EASTERDECOR! BUTT STILL NO BASKET?

(Submitted by Huh? )

I love being "8"!!!! *dancing erotic poster dance*

(Submitted by Scout )

PETR JELLY? And no CONDOMS? Man, you live on the edge.

(Submitted by TJ )

Nope, 5th poster doesn't dance, and rest assured 3rd poster is, well, the person who made the third post... So... I guess what I'm trying to say is... Too bad so sad, maybe next time.

(Submitted by TJ )

Speaking of posters, I've got a rather nice one. I've printed all the receipts and taped them together to make one big poster. Since there was so much tape and it wasn't staying together I had to make copies of three at a time (no cheap copies either, I got the good kind, especially because of the signed ones). Now the stay together. Good. I suppose I need to get up and tape this one I just printed...

(Submitted by jenay )

Derek rushed on in on his lunch hour!! (*really need some vaseline...RIGHT NOW*) I think that any poster can dance anytime, as long as they feel the need too! Chiq, is the EASTER DECOR hard to learn? Maybe we can all do it in a line dance!!

(Submitted by Chiqca )

Hey TJ, nice to meet a kindred soul... we have the same philosophy on post counting. The 3rd post is the 3rd post. Seems simple enough. *spreading liberal amount of JELLY on Habib's PETR* Wow, look at the girth on this thing.

(Submitted by Chiq forgot jenay )

jenay, the EASTERDECOR is not so tough... only slightly more complicated than the Macarena and not nearly as dorky.

(Submitted by Renee )

You are very sad. What---do you live there?

(Submitted by Hill Lord )

Sorry for the momentary lapse of reasoning in my poster counting etiquette. I was just completely distracted at the time by the fact that Derek's Mastercard got to see the light of day. That uppity, bigshot Visa always seems to be the favorite. And Renee, sweetums, did you know that if you don't wear panties you can get a better grip on your VILEDA BROOM? Happy PETR Cottontail to everyone!

(Submitted by jenay )

Hahahaahahahahaahaaa! Hill Lord, that's comedy!!

(Submitted by The Observer )

PETR JELLY is a tasty snack on crack-ers. You all should try it sometime.

(Submitted by nipplesss )

i dont think you ready for this petr jelly.....

(Submitted by The Duke )

Is there an Adult Section at this Wal-Mart? My Wal-Mart won't even carry music with obscene language. Matt must be the MAN

(Submitted by econ210 student )

I go to community college and my economics teacher actually told our class about this site. She kinda stumbled upon it while searching for wal- mart info .. she said it was addictiving and it is !!

(Submitted by Leslie )

I don't know what's more amazing... 1...that I haven't been here in about 2 years 2...that I haven't been here in about 2 years yet this site is still up & running while thousands have failed 3...that Matt is still the manager at some Wal-Mart in the middle of nowhere

(Submitted by Welcoming Committee Huh? )

*grabbing bullhorn* Welcome to all college students from ECON210 --- shouldn't you all be down south partying somewhere instead of cruising the 'net? Eggheads!!!

(Submitted by Huh? )

*whew* (at least Leslie didn't tell us to "Get a life")

(Submitted by Chelle )

*Dancing the I don't know what poster I am* EASTERDECOR in line and BAM I slipped on some of that Petr Jelly.... we really should be more careful!! HAPPY EASTER fellow cult enthusiasts!!!!

(Submitted by Enthusiast Chiquita Bunny )

*doing the EASTERDECOR & gyrating my hips & a very un- Easter-like manner* Happy Easter right back to you, Chelle! But watch out for that PETR JELLY, it has a funny way of getting all over the place. Say, do these bunny ears make me look fat?

(Submitted by Imagine )

Dancing the 27th poster dance on my Twister poster. Huh? Chiqca? Wanna dance?

(Submitted by Huh? )

...... right foot red, left foot blue, right hand PETR JELLY, left hand EASTERDECOR .......

(Submitted by lieu )

petr jelly... now available in a squeezable tube.

(Submitted by lieu )

hey you singles... try our seedless variety.

(Submitted by Jelly, Peter Jelly )

lieu, HTF did you get them to do that? They mis-spelled your name though. And Chiq, no quarters, I AM glad to see ya.

(Submitted by Huh? )

I prefer PETR JELLY in the convenient pump *right foot YELLOW*

(Submitted by arnold )

what choo talkin' about Willis?

(Submitted by Hoosier Huh? )

GO I.U. !!!!

(Submitted by hunney )

Well, wonder how the Petr Jelly eggs went over with the kiddies???? Sorta squishy but what the hey when you wear just the EasterDecor what does it matter.....

(Submitted by BBoy )

Of course, we celebrate Orthodox Easter and buy all our chockies on Easter Tuesday, when they're all marked down to half- price....learnt that one in ECON120

(Submitted by susiedontemailmemyemailisfake )

and we are all happy happy happy everafter as choc is twice as good as prozac it is A Known Fact

(Submitted by Velveteen Rabbit )

Any holiday that has a rabbit is a good holiday. BTW, did you know I'm Real?

(Submitted by Valvoline Rabbit )

pass the PETR JELLY down here.. right paw yellow

(Submitted by lieu )

boy, i wish i could pass the petr jelly.

(Submitted by Huh? )

*right foot blue from stepping in used PETR JELLY* How much longer do I hafta play this game?

(Submitted by Not Andre )

Spin the wheel, drop in the ball.......Double Zero! Everyone face NNW, bow down and pray to Derek!

(Submitted by NYCFASHIONGIRL )

MY GUESS IS.............PEANUT BUTTER JELLY BEANS?

(Submitted by wendy )

okay, i stumbled upon this web site but in some sick way this is soooo freaking cool i love wal-mart, its the happiest place on earth

(Submitted by Imagine )

Left foot green, right hand Huh?

(Submitted by Huh? )

A little to the left with the right, please...

(Submitted by susiedontemailmemyemailisfake )

WHY DONT U EVER BUY ANY TEQUILA DEREK???? HAVE U GOT SOMETHING AGAINST MEXICANS OR WOT? THIS IS NO FUN IM TIRED OF THE MT DEW AND THE WHITE GLOBES ARE FADING......

(Submitted by HUH?dontemailmeeitherbecausemyaddressisf )

WHATSAMATTA? Ya don't like-a da PETR JELLY?

(Submitted by Colonel Sanders )

It's finger-licking good.

(Submitted by Titi Maria )

This is mad freaky folks. Whats worse - I like it!

(Submitted by Tia Maria )

A little bit of what your auntie recommends does you good ....

(Submitted by sexi jessi )

are u gunna masterbate with the jelly... if so can i watch ?

(Submitted by Huh? )

*running and hiding in the corner of the toaster box*

(Submitted by John )

Buy Hunchback II !!!! Quick

(Submitted by Jeff )

This is stupid as hell.

(Submitted by Bobby the Guy )

If I were you, I would buy a gun from Wal-Mart, and use it on myself.

(Submitted by Daryl )

Petr Jelly and Easter decorations? Well, they say after 3 days he rose again.

(Submitted by HUH? )

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ALL ABOUT? YOU PEOPLE SUCK!

(Submitted by TJ )

Let's see... hmmm, yes, this IS why links that bring 1500 people aren't necessarily a good thing. Think about how many degenerates that like bacon that is... Way more than 100, that's for sure. The more apples that come through, the better chance of finding one.    I stopped checking the first receipt a while back, I just couldn't stand all the smf comments on there...

(Submitted by Tj )

chance of finding a bad one*

(Submitted by Andre )

What do you think of my Easterdecor? Hmm? No? Well what if I put just a touch of Petr Jelly just here? Brill? Ooh, how Jackson Pollock of you!

(Submitted by Gern Blandston )

My, my... Daryl and Bobby have got issues, dontcha fellers??? You got the kids in the Honeycomb Toaster Box Hideout all shook up. Although I did like the shotgun reference. Play nice and be one of the gang, or else you won't be able to make cutesy comments with the rest of the crew... <blushing with excitement... that, or high blood pressure>

(Submitted by Hill Lord )

I can't wait to meet the visitors that show up when this site gets linked from the EvenMoreIdiots'R'Us.com site! Hope everyone had a nice Easter.

(Submitted by Abi )

*inserting cutesy comment with PetrJelly* See, it didn't hurt...

(Submitted by susie )

Would that be the degenerates who like Francis Bacon?

(Submitted by Jenay )

Hey...I like being in the toaster box... by the way, Hill Lord, I had a splendid Easter, thank you!!!

(Submitted by lieu )

what's "masterbate"? sounds kinda... ummm... german.

(Submitted by toasty )

"masterbate" is an anagram for 'ate breast m'

(Submitted by In Shock Huh? )

*peeking through fingers* Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, POTTY MOUTH HUH?

(Submitted by Huh? )

I like Kevin Bacon. And nice outfit, Andre, the jelly give it real sparkle. Happy weekend everybody.

(Submitted by Hill Lord )

I wonder which is worse, PETR JELLY or BEAVER CHZ?

(Submitted by Tom )

Here I go again.I got out of this site 7 months ago,after being sucked in. You see it all started with the first reciept... There I was surfin',mindin' and doin' my own thing, when all of a sudden the Walmart receipt vortex swallowed me up.It took me so long to find my way out. Like Captain Kirk said, "to explore,to seek out new worlds, to boldly go where no man has gone before". I still think this is a funny site,most of the comments help make it even better. To those of you who continue to leave degenerate comments, Why? The moral decline of our country. Why tear up someone elses art?

(Submitted by John Donne )

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee.

(Submitted by Guess Who? )

All you bored surfers, try www.dictionaraoke.org -- I suggest Dr Seuss "Green Eggs and Ham"

(Submitted by Guess Who Again? )

Take a quiz: www.drudabear.com/quiz.htm

(Submitted by wayne jones )

At Walmart we don't care about customers. it is my job to focus on the stock price of Walmart.That is what is really important.

(Submitted by Sparky )

I think this site STOMPS! Any site this cool should be in the muthafukkin web site hall of fame! I'll tell all my friends, they will think this mad mofo stomps too. I work at W-M, and I'm gonna tell everybody at my store about this they'll love it Oh, and for that TJ guy who posted at the top the poster is a cool idea. Maybe you should group them by year so you don't have to re-do it everytime a new one is posted.

(Submitted by Wondering )

I run with scissors and play well with others. Does this mean I can join the group?

(Submitted by Ross )

derek, i've been trying to find use of your site, and it finally happened. I got to write a research paper about a person with a weird hobby. you are the man Derek, you are now famous here in Michigan too. I also included you in my fav. links http://personal.cmich.edu/~ras hk1r/ is my site.. and this my ex- wife's site. she kinda likes you Derek.. hehe. Peace http://personal.cmich.edu/~tis he1ep

(Submitted by Dracos )

Actually Derek, the above is not a research paper, it's supposed to be short story. I am the recepient of said "research paper." I had to see if you were for real. And so you definitely fall under "creative non-fiction." The story is good, but it was way too weird to be made up. great site

(Submitted by I see all )

Petr Jelly, huh? It seems that he was successful in talking the wife into a little anal by means of the Easter Grass. Right on, my Walmart-shopping, dope- smoking, EasterDecor-loving friend. Oh yeah...Viva la Dri Bottoms!

(Submitted by Skuff )

Ok, im a 24 yrold guy from the UK, i work in the web business and have seensome funny stuff - but this, this is just - i mean, what the f**k!? strange, very strange.

(Submitted by Bump )

This place is one of a kind Its Kind of WEIRD BUT C00L

(Submitted by Andre )

Bump, you really think so? I did think the PETR JELLY gave the EASTERDECOR a certain Addams Family chic *waving turkey baster flamboyantly and batting eyelids in a comely fashion*.

(Submitted by Dances With Artichokes )

I name you "Wondering, Runs With Scissors"

(Submitted by Abi )

I would just like to point out that being from the UK doesn't mean not having a sense of humour. Mind you, I'm not a 24 year old guy, maybe that's the difference. But Skuff, hang on in there, it becomes compulsive.

(Submitted by katie )

Did you eat paint chips as a child? Why ever would you want to post wal mart receipts on the internet?? hmm.. and what is it with the jelly man... I bet you were doing the hibbidy dibbidy with it

(Submitted by Sheesh )

Judging by katie's post, it's clear rocketscience.com has linked to this site.

(Submitted by Abi )

Too funny!! That's made my day....

(Submitted by Big Papa )

Hibbidy dibbidy??? What the fu...Oh...never mind.

(Submitted by Pee Wee )

I know you are but what am I?

(Submitted by Huh? )

*toasting to the wit of the random posters* CHEERS all!!

(Submitted by lambie )

*dancin' 1st poster special dance*....*lookin' around*...thinkin*...*dancin' just cause I'm happy dance*...

(Submitted by MOGGEE )

*dancin 2nd poster after lambie :-)* ...It's as close as I'm gonna get to the real thing.

(Submitted by BBoy )

Hang in there, Moggie...sprinkle potsoil round the bed, drink some Mt Dew, put on that Suave CD on low in hte background, and lie back and think of the WalMart wish-fairy, and one day you will be first poster. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen...

(Submitted by spongebob )

Ok, I am new at all of this. I saw a show on WebTv, about useless websites. So I checked it out and this is so funny. I also think that this websie has us studying an individual who is performing for much of our amusement. Also I think that it opens up the door for more useless websites. I know I will never look at my walmart reciept again. I also know that I will never buy dribottoms. This poor guy obviously works for the Dribottom company..or has stock or something. :)

(Submitted by susiewebsie )

*Dancing with scissors*

(Submitted by btw, calling it useless was undoubtably intended as a joke... )

Yes, spongebob, that's exactly right, has stock or something. OOH I KNOW! Maybe the something was a little baby? Maybe he was buying diapers for a baby? What kind of horrible person would buy diapers for their baby? Bad derek.

(Submitted by Matt )

Derek, This is Matt K. Where've you been, man? Don't tell corporate, but this week we set up an unauthorized special on Mountain Dew that we know you're not going to refuse. Also, Katie the cashier's offering her body to you; she set up a special private place back in the stock room where she wants to make baby. I think she's trying to bend the genome into producing offspring with WalMart smiley faces. You can bet the first words will be "we sell for less." Don't worry about that maniacal outburst you made the other day, when the dribottoms ran out; we got you covered...

(Submitted by Huh? )

I feel tingly all over.

(Submitted by tingly )

lower...lower...

(Submitted by bernardo samuelicz pelezeveselvezela )

I you think these website more than fun. I staying hotel in Romania now, many more time look to these site for large lagh. I want to WalMart find here at Bucharest, in free time make webisite for how much Dorito bags eat in one month. Very funny, smile only in WalMart here, except outside are people look sad. I will next write from very soon front line at somewhere at West Bank. Thank very much...Be one another good

(Submitted by lambie )

uh....anyone have a clue as to WHAT bernie is talkin' about?

(Submitted by private dancer )

hoooooow loooooooooow can you go?

(Submitted by A Ninja )

Quah?

(Submitted by Chiqca's Tranlsation Services (I speak many languages: Nannerese, Californian, Female, & The Language of Love) )

Translation for bernardo: He's bored in his Romanian hotel room, cruising the web, found Der's receipts, is having a good laugh, wants to find his own WalMart to visit, plans on creating some sort of Dorito-related web site, and he'll see us again from the West Bank.

(Submitted by tinkerbelle )

*dancing around the toaster box, trying to learn the EASTERDECOR, munchin on PETR JELLY, hoping some one will let me in!* And asks' " Can I play in the toaster box wit you guys?"

(Submitted by jhyuu )

?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ?????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????

(Submitted by konfyoozed )

I have a hunch(back) that ST# 1627 doesn't sell text- wrap.......................... .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. ..............................

(Submitted by Huh? )

My oh my. It's sure getting a'crowded in here, Pappy.

(Submitted by Pink )

Is it just me, or has this site become commodious?

(Submitted by Derek D Sysop )

Who knows why, but some things hurt text wrapping lately (and only in some browsers), especially browsers that ignore the programmer's intended dimensions for the table. I think I've solved it for now...thank you for your time, go back about your business...

(Submitted by BalmainBoy )

So many question( mark)s, so little inclination to answer. I just follow the caravanserai, sweeping up the detrius where D's foot has trod...

(Submitted by Huh? )

*giving BB the Aussie Salute*

(Submitted by BalmainBoy )

Hey! Leave our flies alone!

(Submitted by Abi )

*swooning* DEREK was here!!! I'm never going to wash this receipt again....

(Submitted by Pink )

OH Derek, I LOVE it when you talk computerish.

(Submitted by jenay )

Oh Derek...Thank you!! I was so, so sad. *wiping tear* Unable to post for two days! TINKERBELLE...please join us. There is plenty of room for you here, and I think Huh? has a nanner left over.

(Submitted by konfyoozed kommentator )

And weeeeeeelcome back WATCH to the Truman (Derek) show! Truman's really raking OUT in those WalMart FOR purchases. Last week, we saw Truman SUBLIMINAL sweating as he was MESSAGES taking care of IN his kid; seemed like he was really WAL jonesing for Mountain Dew from his fave store. MART Truman, what fun will you bring us next??? Phone lines RECEIPTS are open; give us a call at (218) 233 8336 and predict the next receipt date! Operators are standing by...

(Submitted by If I were a smf, would that give me a sense of ulfillment? )

I've been pondering this question for a while, and I was wondering what other's thought on the subject... If I were a homeless whino, what bench would I sit on?         Where would YOU sit?

(Submitted by correction, Fulfillment )

I am laughing.

(Submitted by konfyoozed )

On a tangent.............Heidi Fleiss being interviewed by Greta van Susteren. Now, there was a pair WalMart DIY plastic surgery cases. Scary. Derek, stay away from those plastic surgery kits over in aisle 4, please....

(Submitted by jenay )

Those would be in asile 256 in my store...we have a SUPER WAL-MART in my town!!!!!

(Submitted by jenay )

Oops, spelled "aisle" incorrectly, sorry.

(Submitted by Stu )

No prolbem jenay

(Submitted by The Ghoul )

Haven't you used up that PETR JELLY yet?

(Submitted by Time to go shopping Derek )

Come on already!! Give us something new. Please? I might start up my EASTER GRASS addiction again...

(Submitted by lambie )

*gasp*...derek told us to go about our business!! WE HAVE BUSINESS!!! uh..hey, when did we get business anyhow?

(Submitted by Huh? )

Just throw a banana in the toaster box and watch the fun begin! Kids, don't try this one at home!

(Submitted by Imagine )

One bright spot: Discount retailing giant Wal-Mart Stores (WMT ) raised its guidance for first-quarter same-store sales after reporting a 9.5% increase in March at its stores open at least a year.

(Submitted by Hill Lord )

There's a few cuties here that I wouldn't mind throwing a banana into! : )

(Submitted by donkey of oz )

hum de hum de............................ .............................. .............................. .............................. ................*snif*........ .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. ............................la laaaaaaa, laa laaa la la laa laaaaaaaa..................... .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. .............................. ......"bweedopbweedopbweedopbw e...................whup...... .....yeah just hanging at the puter..................hell no, i ain't goin to work till this guy buys sumpin........................ ...............whadya mean.......................... .............................. .............................. ........yo.......yo......back off, man................i ain't no retard........................ .............................. ...........................you got no idea what's like ta be first poster, maaaaaaan....................b ack OFF........................... ....................."

(Submitted by tin man )

somebody needs a braaaain...

(Submitted by Huh? )

doncha mean scrawcrow?

(Submitted by Huh? )

*hitting myself upside head* "Scarecrow". duh.

(Submitted by Huh? )

ha ha, the text didn't wrap for the Ass of Oz!! All hail Derek *worshipping Derek's post above*

(Submitted by Cowdarly Lyin )

Huh? with spelling like that, you may be qualified to work at WAL*MART. Congrats.

(Submitted by konfyoozed )

Now, now, Lyin...I don't think the limbo bar goes that low. I'm sure there are some over-educated people working at WAL*MART, just like in the waitering, cab-driving, sanitation, grave-digging, etc. businesses. People just seem to make some strange choices sometimes. Who knows, you may one day be graced by the cosmic wisdom of a 17- year-old pimply-faced WAL*MART cashier, leading to information that may bring you great success. Thus, walk humbly through the variety store of life with the kindest of intentions and humility, for the gods of marketing and commerce (statistically) know your every step. Amen

(Submitted by Happy Fingers Huh? )

Why that's how we say Scarecrow here in the midwest: Scccraawwwcrow. Put a little twang in it. Butt never add in PETR JLY.

(Submitted by Huh? )

*dabbing stridex on zits*

(Submitted by Soup Nazi )

NO SOUP FOR YOU!

(Submitted by konfyoozed )

*Yawn* Up bright and early today. Dished out nanner soup for breakfast.

(Submitted by tara )

so..um, which "power that be" told you to take the tc# and hide it? curious....do you work there or something?

(Submitted by busmun )

.........nothing......finer then....well................... ...........it's not her fault............nanneresque for the............................ ......

(Submitted by tj )

tara, Walmart was going to remove the site, threatened legal action and the like...

(Submitted by Huh? )

He blurs the TC code "Because he can" *clapping for me*

(Submitted by Abi )

*ducking* whoa, watch what you do with that nanner Hill Lord....

(Submitted by Andre Boon )

Petr Jelly was a man, was a brave man, and he fought for the something or other to make all something or others free ee ee ee............................ ...........

(Submitted by The Legal Dept. )

tara, let's just say there was a little cease & desist situation & the TC# lost.

(Submitted by Jenay )

I went to "my" Super Wal-Mart yesterday. (Store # 577) The woman at the door said they were out of the regular Wal- Mart smiley face stickers, and that I could have an M&M one instead. I took it, and even wore it on my t-shirt, but it just wasn't the same...

(Submitted by Sad Face Chiquita )

I've never been offered a smiley face sticker at any Wal*Mart (or an M&M sticker for that matter). Then again, this IS California... they're probably afraid someone will sue 'em. Smiley face abuse or sumpthin.

(Submitted by toasty )

Yeah, at my Wal*Mart they just have plain clothes security guards followin' me around. I have smiley face envy. Maybe in California they could give out 'neutral expression face'.

(Submitted by jenay )

That makes me get an un- smiley face,Chiquita. :( They never offer them to me, I ALWAYS have to ask. Something about them being for the kids..? Still, the M&M sticker left me unfullfilled with the whole shopping experience. You may want to ask if they have them next time you shop. Good luck to you. May the Wal-Mart gods smile upon you!! If not, I'll send ya one!

(Submitted by Huh? )

M&M stickers vs. Smilies: Can't we all just get along? *slinging 'nanner into toaster box*

(Submitted by jenay )

OUCH! *rubbing forehead*

(Submitted by Walmart Smiley )

Watch for falling nanners!

(Submitted by BalmainBoy )

Jenay, Chiq IS one of the WalMart gods, so if she can't get one, it must be the twelfth commandment, or sumfin. Perhaps Proposition 56a (the Pandora Principle) was voted in by Orange County, so no benefits of humans could be passed onto the gods.

(Submitted by Abi )

We don't get nothin' over here.....I was so excited to see my first Wal*Mart on a trip to the States, didn't go in though. I have missed out on much....